That Remain

4 months that remain,

I see what I can see,

This is the test that I waited for,

The anchor that holds me down,

I sit here and look at myself,

I want to learn these traits of life,

I think it makes me a heretic,

But to survive I cannot be without skill,

So my consciousness is torn up,

But my body has chosen this path,

I need I know and I will make it,

In the short term it is all I can do,

All I can think of,

So help me.